Chuck Norris

While doing research for a College Writing paper, I stumbled upon some Chuck Norris jokes. I also stumbled upon a list of Chuck Norris's favorite Chuck Norris jokes, so I will post those. I had never heard many of these, and all of them are very high quality, picked by the man himself. Enjoy!

~When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
~Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
~There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
~Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
~Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
~Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
~Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
~Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
~There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
~When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
~Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
~Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
~There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.
~Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
~Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
~Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.
~Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
~Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost
~Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
~Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

Steven Colbert

So, Steven Colbert got himself a Wii. What did he do with it? Just check the video. . .

SNOW!

I live in Oregon so here, snow is a big deal. It simply doesn't snow as often as we'd all like, but this week we were graced with the fluffy white stuff so much so that I am writing this particular entry while enjoying a 2 hour delay before I have to go to school. I have two stories to tell. The first is from calculus class. We were all sitting peacefully, working on homework, when all of a sudden somebody opens the classroom door. Now, since the door was open, a person in my class had an opportunity to lean back in his chair and look out the door and down the hallway. . .

"Look at all that snow! It's snowing so hard!"

*VWOOM!* Half the class leaps out of their chairs and runs to the door. No exaggeration, we jumped up and ran. Once we got to the door and saw the snow it was only a matter of time before the inevitable happened. One brave student made a run for it, out the door and into the snow. We looked at each other nervously. Another made a break for it. After that it was everybody for themselves as we stormed from the classroom and outside into the snow. Snowballs were thrown, snowflakes were caught on tongues, it was a happy moment. Unfortunately, our teacher ran after us and made us come back in, but it was a happy escape from calculus for a little bit.

Ok, second story, this one with pictures. After school I went outside to walk home and the principle's car was parked right by the door I was exiting. Somebody had built a snowman on the hood of her car! Not a big one, just a small snowman. I found this fascinating, and began the construction of more snowmen. Soon I had a small crew of people helping me and eventually we had constructed no less than 10 small snowmen all over the principle's Mercedes Benz. We then proceeded to create a big snowman right in front of her door so that she couldn't gain entry into her car. It was all rather exciting. Snow brings out the best in people me thinks. Here are some camera phone pics of the car, not the greatest quality, but you'll get the idea!

Wii Bowling

My Wii Experience

So, Saturday and Sunday came, and went. I haven't had time to blog my experience up until now, sorry. Here it is, my version of the Wii Epic:

Saturday began with me waking up at about 9:30 am. I wandered around the house for about an hour, leisurely cleaning and picking things up for when Lacey came over. She was due to show up at about noon, but she ended up arriving at 1:45, apparently they were running late, not quite sure how they could run THAT late, but eh, it gave me time to relax and watch the U of O game (the ducks are quite poor at defense). She soon arrived and when she came inside we made our pizza. We discovered that rolling pizza dough into a circle is very difficult because it seems to like the shape it is, always reverting back to a ball no matter how hard you roll it. We managed to conquer the beast, however, and soon enough we had a quite tasty pizza ready for the eating. I put Swedish Fish on mine, it tasted quite good, but Lacey preferred the Swedish Fish separately. We watched a little tv and then started a movie but never got to finish it. Instead, we decided to start our Wii adventure at 5:00. We loaded up chairs, hot chocolate, cards, soda, sushi, books, warm clothes, and all the necessities, and headed out.

Our first stop was the mall so that I could pay off the balance on my Wii. Easy enough, no problem, all payed off. We wandered the mall and explored a little bit, and then left for WalMart. On the way to Wally World we stopped at Fred Meyer to explore, check out the Wii line, and buy some energy drinks. There were a bunch of people in line, but it was obvious that more could still join and safely get a Wii. We left Fred Meyer in favor of WalMart, and arrived at our destination shortly after leaving Freddy's.

When we got to WalMart we carted all of our stuff over to the line and sat at the end. We were number 24. After calling and going in, we were assured that there would be 26 consoles, so we could even buy one if we wanted. Alas, we were there simply for a controller, so it didn't matter. We began waiting in line at 7:00.

Line Stories

>Patrick<
So there's a kid in my clarinet section, a freshman, named Patrick. Patrick wanted a Wii too, but not having a pre-order somewhere, was forced into line waiting. He took it in stride though, and managed to get spot #1. He got in line at 9 in the morning and had been there all day. Patrick basically rocks. He came down and chatted with us for a while, kept me and Lacey entertained.

>Liz and Brady<
Soon enough, Liz (buffalo wings girl) and Brady (some other freshman) show up outside of WalMart after having done some shopping and could not believe that Patrick and I were actually in line (they had thought we were joking about doing it, shows how much they know). They chatted with us for a little bit and then took off.

>Pop Cans and Cars<
About 2 hours into our wait, the end of the line started to get slightly restless, so we developed a game. Place a popcan in the street and see if a car smashes it. At first we didn't have much success, but we developed a system after a while. Place the can such that a car turning from one row of the parking lot to another is forced to smash it due to their turning radius. We smashed 2 cans this way. We got another when a minivan lined up at one end of the parking lot and actually gunned it towards the popcan. He hit it at probably 35 mph, it was amazing.

>PS3 Guy<
At one point, a guy showed up to stand in line for the Wii, and after talking for a bit, we discovered that he had waited 38 hours for a PS3 as well. He had scored 3 of the 4 WalMart had sold, so he said he was going to sell 2 and keep one. He showed me a picture on his camera phone, he wasn't lying. He hopped in line for the Wii with a buddy, numbers 25 and 26. The line was now full. >Manager< At about 9 o'clock I went inside the store and inquired as to the availability of controllers, since that was the only reason I was there. The managers assured me that they had controllers and that they were going to go back and start looking for the huge pallete of accessories.

>Tickets<
At 10 o'clock they came out to distribute tickets. Here's what we heard:
"Alright, we're handing out tickets now. We have 20."

TWENTY?!?!?! All day you've been saying 26! Needless to say, number 21 in line was a little upset. But, the irony of it all is slightly amusing, so I'll share. His name is Ben, he goes to my high school. It was his birthday (irony #1), he was number 21 in line (irony #2) and he had also been number 5 in line for the 4 PS3's WalMart had (irony #3). All in all, it was a bad day to be Ben. They passed out the tickets and everybody after number 20 left, except for me and Lacey. By this time, Lacey is wrapped in countless numbers of warm things and trying to sleep.

They let everybody get out of line since all the tickets were out, but we had to stay on the property or in the store. We all retreated to the store to stay warm. We spent about an hour inside WalMart, hanging out with Patrick, until I found the manager again and asked about the controllers.

"Right, about the controllers, we can't find them"
The smile instantly disappeared from my face
"What?"
"Well, we can't seem to find the palette of controllers, so we aren't going to sell them tonight."
"I've been in line since 7 for controllers you guys promised me and now you aren't going to sell them?!?!"
"Nope, sorry"
"I'll help you look for them!"
"No"

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lacey and I ditched the WalMart scene. We headed over to Fred Meyer where there were about 60 people in line for 54 consoles. Tickets were out and everybody was just waiting until midnight. I saw a bunch of people from my school there and we chatted for a bit, but ended up leaving and driving around downtown for a while just because the car was warm. We got back to Fred Meyer at about 11:45, just in time for the launch. We gave $60 to some kid that was 4th in line so that he could buy me a controller, and he did. He went in, and then came back out with a Wii and a bag full of accessories, some for me! I officially had a Wiimote. YAY! SUCK IT WALMART!

Lacey and I took off for the mall next. We arrived, walked in, picked up the system, and then left. Very anti-climactic, except for the fact that I HAD A WII! We hopped in the car and then drove to my house.

When we got home we unloaded all of our line-waiting things from the car and went inside. Lacey changed into PJ's while I set everything up. There was A LOT of plastic and tape and padding in that box, it looked like an entire family's worth of Christmas wrapping paper all over the floor. But, we waded through the foam and pushed the power button. The Wii glowed to life. It was beautiful.

In popped Wii Sports and we were off. First game on the Wii, Tennis. AMAZING! Lacey and I had a blast! Next we bowled a bit and then golfed. All were amazing! By this time it's 2:30 in the morning and Lacey is exhausted. She lays on the couch and tries to fall asleep while I sit at the end of the couch, acting as a foot rest, playing Rayman Raving Rabbids. Another amazing game. She watched for a while and eventually fell asleep. I played for about 2 hours before getting tired myself, so I just kinda shifted around on the couch and ended up falling asleep using Lacey as a pillow while holding the Wiimote. Romantic or sad? I'll let you decide. . .

At 6:30 we woke up played some bowling. Lacey kicked my butt, it wasn't even a contest. While I showered and got ready for work she played some baseball, which she said was quite fun as well. With my Wii I got an iron-on shirt decal, a temporary tattoo, and a pen, all with Wii stamped all over them. I did my iron on before heading off to work. Lacey and I got coffee at Starbucks and then my mom took her home while I spent all day at work swinging the controller around like a madman! After work I rushed to the mall, bought the guide to Zelda: Twilight Princess, and then rushed home. I got home at 6 o'clock, and Jake came over.

Jake and I played Wii boxing. Never again. Ever. I'm still sore, and I got so tired that I had to just lay on the ground. Boo! lol We also bowled a few frames and Jake got 5 strikes in a row! It was quite a feat. Soon, Greg showed up, just in time to catch some bunny shooting action in Rayman. Shortly after that, Patrick and Kehl (Patrick from the line, Kehl being another freshman in my section) came over with 2 more controllers and Red Steel. 4 player tennis and Red Steel action baby! Oh, and sorry for smacking you in the back during tennis Patrick, I got a little into it, my bad!

After our gaming session (in which Greg pwned us all at Red Steel), everybody left and I went to bed. It had been a long day.

The next day at school I wore my Wii shirt and put my temporary tattoo on my face. It was the day of the Wii. Fortunately, some of the guys outside of Fred Meyer brought two controllers to school, so during speech team we hooked up the Wii to our teacher's projector and played it on the wall. TENNIS! Our teacher got so into it, I think he may buy one. I took it to school the next day as well, hooking it up to the projector in my CAD class. We only got to play during lunch, but it was still fun!

That is the Wii epic up until this point. This blog entry is long enough, so I'll end it here. The Wii is everything it was cracked up to be, and all of the non-gamers that I let play it have all really enjoyed it, Nintendo succeeded. Lacey will be buying one and having a Wii birthday party coming up and I'm going to keep buying games and controllers. I bought an aluminum briefcase the other day to store it, so I'll let you know when that project is complete. Until later, cheerio, and I hope you buy a Wii.

MIT Wii

I will do a full coverage blog about my Wii experience (yes, I got one, yes, it's amazing) later, but right now I have something to share quickly before I go to bed.

I MUST GO TO MIT.

On the release date of the Wii, of course MIT got hacked, a DOME hack no less! Those amazing techers put a FREAKING TRIFORCE ON THE FREAKING DOME! I cried.

HA!

HA! PWNED!

SATURDAY!

This entry isn’t about something neat on the internet, sorry. Here’s the premise: I am excited for Saturday. So excited that I am writing a blog entry about how amazing Saturday is going to be, detailing all of my adventures for you. Ready? Here we go!



WORD VERSION:
The day will begin just as every Saturday begins, with me waking up and taking a shower, but instead of sweatpants and a shirt, I get to dress nicely because at noon Lacey is coming over! Yay! Lacey and I are going to watch movies, swing dance, and generally have a good time. I am going shopping tomorrow and buying all the ingredients necessary to make a pizza, so for lunch Lacey and I are going to attempt to create our own pizza, crust and all. Wish us luck! Oh, and I’m buying Swedish fish because I love them. After that we are going to head over to the mall and pay off the balance on my Wii preorder, then hot-foot it over to Wal-Mart to wait in line for their midnight launch of the Wii. We hope to get there at about 8 pm and wait. I’m only trying to get a controller, so hopefully it’s not that big of a deal, but I’ll be calling throughout the day to make sure the line doesn’t get out of control or anything. I need that controller, I really do! At midnight we will buy the controller from Wal-Mart and then head back over to the mall for their midnight release, where I have my actual system preordered. I’ll pick that up and then Lacey and I will head back to my house. Once at my house we will set up the Wii and engage in fierce competition (meaning we’ll play Wii Golf until our arms are numb). After that we leave at 6:00 am in order to get Lacey home in time for me to go to work (where I will probably be completely useless because I will be exhausted and really just wanting to go home and play Wii.) Sorry, we’re into Sunday now, but I’m going to keep going. . . . Sunday evening after work, Trevor and Jake are coming over at about 6:30. We will then Wii until 8:30, at which point they will go home and I will continue to Wii until about 11:00 at night.

In a nutshell, I won’t be sleeping this weekend, at all. It’s all about the Wii baby! And of course Lacey, wouldn’t rather have anybody else with me during these amazing times!



PICTURE VERSION:


It's All About:

and




First Stop of the Evening:



Next Stop:

Then Back To:

After Which We go Home to:

Awesome Hotel Room

In Berlin there is a hotel that has each of its rooms designed by a different artist. This is my favorite out of all of them:

It's Cell Shaded!!! It's like walking into a cartoon! There are no photo tricks, this is simply a snapshot taken of the room, amazing, huh? I would definitely stay here. . .

Senior Advisory

My College Writing Paper:

Charles A. Sprague High School is a unique school, in that it sports many attributes that are completely useless and/or ridiculous. Some of these qualities are trivial and acceptable. So what if the room numbers skip from 114 to 170 and then back again to 115? So what if the color of our water matches our walls? So what if our mascot is a Greek Olympian yet we have a Pantheon? These mere trifles are nothing if not amusing when compared to the relatively recent travesty that now graces the schedules of all Olympians, but only totally destroys the lives of the Senior Olympians. Sprague has a block schedule, which does enough to confuse students that are barely awake enough to figure out what their first period class is. Now Sprague’s schedule is so confusing that there isn’t really an accurate term to describe it! Instead of simply switching classes every day, every Tuesday all class periods are shortened and a new class is shoved unwillingly in. . .Advisory. It sounds helpful, perhaps advice is given! No.

The advisory class was designed and voted into being by a board of individuals that haven’t stepped foot into a high school in 20 years. The theory behind the advisory is to divide each class, freshmen through seniors, into small groups of about 20 and distribute them around the school and leave them in the charge of random teachers for 36 minutes. For those 36 minutes, the freshmen, sophomores, and juniors gain important knowledge about the SAT’s, scheduling, and earning requirements to graduate. The seniors, on the other hand, are handed “the folder”, full of either paperwork that we all filled out in our freshman health classes or paperwork that is completely foreign and confusing. We are then told “Go! Oh, and if you do it wrong you won’t graduate.” Do what?

“The folder”, the central focus of the advisory class, is somewhat of a curious oddity. It contains calendars, checklists, resumé building tips, and a variety of other unimportant looking documents, all of which are more colorful than the pile of vomit any senior would spew if they hear the word “CIS” or “CIM” ever again. Many of these papers look as if they could be useful, if they were needed for something other than toilet paper, but it appears that “the folder” is aimed at students that are completely helpless and will never get jobs, ever. “The folder” contains an immense amount of material and the less-than-immense amount of instructions on how to use said materials.

Teachers of the senior advisory classes are ill-prepared and uninformed. No need to beat around the bush, they simply have no idea what the seniors are supposed to be doing. They simply tell the seniors to fill out the folders.

“How?”

“I don’t know, ask Carlotta.”

“Ok,” *forgets/doesn’t care* It’s not that the teachers don’t care (perhaps), but that they were simply never told what to do. That’s fitting, create a brand new and confusing GRADUATION REQUIREMENT that nobody is qualified to administor, then punish students for not caring about material in a folder that doesn’t apply to their lives.

When the actual, physical folder is examined, one will find a series of lists, checkboxes, and blank spaces for signatures. The meaning/use of these markings is currently unknown, but many seniors believe that at one point they will need to get signatures for something. Nobody knows what the signatures mean, or if they’re part of the graduation requirement, but that’s typical in senior advisory. When one attempts to read the folder, they discover that every other word is an acronym, standing for God knows what, but still requiring a signature.

“What does ‘AJEBN’ stand for and why do I have to do it for five hours?”

“I don’t know, ask Carlotta.”

“Ok,” *forgets/doesn’t care* Of course, all of this is immaterial, because at the end of the typical senior’s 36 minutes of mind-numbing advisory hell, the folders go into a filing drawer, not to be seen again until the next week. “The folder” isn’t allowed out of the classroom, so they will never be signed, ever.

Advisor class is the epitomy of the useless Sprague attribute. It is a confusing waste of time that makes seniors almost more willing to not graduate than complete “the folder”. Should the seniors be worried about graduating? Shouldn’t they be actively researching what they need to complete “the folder”? Eh, who cares.

Speech Team Joke

So, today in speech team, we were all just kinda chillin'. Not much was going on, we were recovering from a tournament last weekend, so in theory we were supposed to be doing homework we couldn't do during the tournament. Well, during a lively discussion, I slammed my fist down on my table, which happened to have a water bottle sitting on it. The water bottle jumped straight up about a half inch and then fell back down again. This was absolutely amazing to me, and to Truman. Well, I happened to have a slide rule on my desk (don't ask), so Truman picked it up and decided to test his reaction time. I would pound the table and he would try to stick the slide rule under the bottle while it was in the air. This is all fine and dandy, and our speech team coach even looked across the room at us to see what we were doing. In fact, the room was very quiet as Truman an I focused on our "Smash the table and get the slide rule under the bottle" game. After succeeding several times, Truman then graduated to the "Smash the table and get the slide rule under the bottle and then pull it out from under the bottle" game. Well, when our coach saw this, he became a skeptic. The following course of dialogue was so fluid and perfect, it was astounding. Everybody in the classroom starting crying they were laughing so hard, everybody, no exceptions. It was a good 3 minutes before we could regain control.

*I slam table and Truman unsuccessfully removes the slide rule from under the bottle*
Teacher: Were you actually expecting to pull that out?
Truman: That's what SHE said!
*Cue shocked/well-deserved laughter*

That is what happens in speech team, folks, amazing things. Amazing things.

A conversation between fanboys. . .

I had a conversation with a fellow Wii Fanboy today. Here's that conversation. We're obsessed. The only way to really share that conversation with you involves you clicking the following link.

Please click this link.

Please.

You will enjoy it, I promise!

http://jzzsxm.googlepages.com/Fanboy.htm

Swing Dancing

Yes, I went swing dancing. Amazing, huh? Michael, the "I don't dance" king of the world finally just bit his lip and stepped out of his comfort zone last night. How did this happen? Well. . .

Yesterday (Friday) I was text-messaging Lacey when she mentioned she was going swing dancing that evening. I mentioned that it sounded like she'd have a good time. Next thing I know, my phone rings.

"Hey Michael, want to come swing dancing tonight?"
"Uh, I don't actually know how to swing dance."
"They do a quick class beforehand and then I'll help you!"
"Alright, sure."

I changed into my "spiffy" outfit (Black shoes and pants, silver collared shirt) and got all ready to go.

An hour later my dad and I met Lacey at the Woodburn outlet mall and I hopped into their car. Eventually, we made it to the dance studio, but here's the catch. It was pouring outside and it was dark, so the car ride took much longer than expected, ie, we missed the quick class beforehand. Actually, that's not entirely true, we caught the last ten minutes of it, which only proved to about half the people there that I was a complete n00b. We had a big circle with two layers, girls on the inside, guys on the outside, and the guys were rotating every minute or so. I hadn't even learned the basic footwork yet, so I was pretty much useless during the class. After the class they turned the lights down and people actually started dancing, that was about 8:00.

I'm not gonna lie, the first hour was rough. Remember, I am so far outside my comfort zone at this point that I'm about 2 seconds from just running away, but I forced myself to stay and learn. The problem was, there was nobody there to teach me. You see, the guy leads, and so whenever I was dancing with Lacey, I was supposed to do all the stuff. I asked her what I was suppsoed to do for each "move" and she didn't know because she never had to do it. This was a problem, so what ended up happening was that for a while, she danced with a bunch of other people and I watched and learned as fast as I can. I'll tell you right now, that is a hard thing to do.

Eventually, I pretty much got the footwork down, which was nice because then I could actually start to focus on the spinning and what-not. Towards the end I was nowhere near good, but I was much better, better than a lot of the people there. Lacey's feet started to hurt towards the end and we had to sit for a while, but there were a couple of songs there that, had an inexperienced person watched, they would have thought that we both knew what we were doing.

The only big "oops" that happened was Lacey decided that at the end of the song she was going to do a dip. Um, coulda told the guy that's been swing dancing for a grand old total of 45 minutes! I'll spare you the gory details, but it ended up with us on the ground. I think I would have been more emberassed except that it wasn't a crash or anything, it was a gradual descent to the ground (that almost resulted in me breaking my ankle). Other than that, the evening went swimmingly. Oh, and the music was almost distracting because I realized that for every single song, I'd either a) played it or b) owned a CD with it on it. I own a lot of swing.

At 11:30 we finished up and took off. We drove down to my house, Lacey was completely exhausted, she'd been up since 6 am. We got to my house, she came inside and said goodnight to Quincy, we hugged, and then she took off to go sleep. I got home at about 1 am. I stayed up until she got home to make sure she made it safely, and then I went to sleep.

That was my evening last night. Impromptu swing dancing! Totally outside my comfort zone, some very awkward "Why am I here", "Can I just cry", "I really don't like this", moments, but as I got more comfortable I actually started to have a good time. Swing dancing is really fun, I recommend it. Definitely catch the ENTIRE class before the dancing starts, it makes life easier. I'll probably continue to swing dance, believe it or not, I'd like to learn to be pretty good so I don't make an idiot of myself if ever I need dance. Alright, that's it, the Snively Swing experience. Sorry, no pictures, camera was out of batteries and I was dancing. Ciao!

Swing Dancing

I'm going swing dancing tonight, I'll let you know how it goes. w00t.

SOMB Awards

Last night, 11/9/06, were the 2006 Sprague Olympian Marching Band Awards. It was a very exciting evening, so I've decided to blog it. Allow me to give you a play by play. . .

The presentation was begun by Jacob Pratt. He introduced himself as band council president and then led into the awards ceremony. The awards ceremony consisted of section leaders giving out awards to outstanding individuals, and here's a recap. I couldn't remember all of the awards given, but I did my best. If you remember one, please leave it in a comment so I can add it!

Brass (Presented by Truman Capps):
Outstanding Veteran -- Truman Capps
Outstanding Rookie -- Shequana Smith
Most Improved Rookie -- Nick Geiger
Most Improved Vet -- Margaret

Woodwinds (Presented by Michael Snively):
Outstanding Veteran -- Christy Baggett
Outstanding Rookie -- Ethan Alano
Most Improved Rookie -- Erin Kahn
Most Improved Vet -- Steven Ponec

Drumline (Presented by Joe Lipscomb):
Outstanding Veteran -- Joe Lipscomb
Outstanding Rookie -- Austin Baker
Most Improved Rookie -- Logan
Most Improved Vet -- Justin Cothran

Front Ensemble (Presented by Trenton Young):
Most Outstanding -- Trenton Young
Most Improved -- Drew Harker

Color Guard (Presented by Analisa Reyna):
Outstanding Veteran -- Analisa
Outstanding Rookie -- [Can't Remember]
Most Improved Rookie -- [Can't Remember]
Most Improved Vet -- [Can't Remember]

Spirit Award (Presented by Alyssa Valdez):
Male -- Trevor Nelson
Female -- Margaret

Class Awards (Presented by Alyssa Valdez):
Most Outstanding Freshman -- Brady McCulley
Most Outstanding Sophomore -- Nick Ogle
Most Outstanding Junior -- Brandon Haley
Most Outstanding Senior -- Michael Snively

Kevin Alano came up, talked a bit about the band boosters and thanked the parents for their help with the season.

We took a break from awards for a bit to watch our Finals performance at PCI. I was on tech support, so it was my job to make sure the movie played without a hitch. It played without a hitch. I don't have a video of it online, but DVD's are available for purchase, just get in touch with me (comment).

After the video, we continued with some awards. The funny awards were presented

Funny Awards (Presented by Jacob Pratt):
Hottie Award -- Nick Ogle
"Sorry, Your Name isn't Andrew" Award -- Tom
"Do you have a question" Award -- Analisa
"Kid at heart and most likely to be mistaken for a student" Award -- Mr. Such
"Best Impressions and most likely to not be himself" Award -- Mr. Howard

After all the awards had been given out, Mr. Such and Mr. Howard both gave speeches. Both speeches were very nice. After their speeches, Jake and I gave out one final award to Katie Such, for coordinating PCI and making it amazing. She got a trophy.

To finish off the evening, the slideshow. Regular readers of my blog know that I am the one in charge of creating the slideshow, and that I was very excited about it for some reason, but I WOULDN'T TELL YOU WHY! Well, last night the secret came out, and just as I predicted, it was very well received. Here's the story:

This being my senior year, I wanted this slideshow to be absolutely amazing. In order to be amazing, it had to have a certain element to it that no other slideshow has ever had. Well, I thought of that element, but it was going to be hard to attain. If you've ever seen a movie trailer, you've heard a particular man's voice. You know, that deep gravelly "In a world, where . . ." voice that's in every movie trailer ever, the movie voice guy. He was in a Geico commercial recently as well. His name is Don LaFontaine, and I decided to e-mail him, so I went to his website, got his e-mail address, and wrote him an e-mail. I explained that I was the historian for my band and that I was wondering if he would be willing to do a short soundbite for my slideshow. The next day I got an e-mail back. It said "Sure, I'd be happy to -- no charge -- my pleasure. I'll e-mail it to you on Monday". This coming from the man that gets paid thousands of dollars to speak. On Monday, sure enough, I received the e-mail with the MP3. He did two takes, for a total of ten seconds of audio, worth thousands of dollars.

Since the beginning of band camp, our director has used the phrase "In the beginning, there was rhythm" as a constant reminder that we need to internalize pulse. Well, this seemed catchphrasey enough, so this is what I asked Don LaFontaine to say. So, as you watch the following slideshow and hear that voice in the beginning, remember this:

Yes, that is the movie trailer voice guy.
No, no other slideshow has his voice in it.
Yes, although the tone of this blog entry is very reserved, I was uber excited when I found out he'd help me!

Here's the slideshow, enjoy. Turn your speakers on!



As you can see, the slideshow was uploaded to YouTube. I have also uploaded it to Google Videos, where you can actually download it as an MP4 file. The links are below:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8Nt-sjt-7U
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=2546356929785449331&hl=en


The slideshow was a huge success. It seemed as though everybody really enjoyed it, based on how many hands I shook afterwards and how many copies were requested. I'm glad everybody liked it, I hope I can make the spring slideshow just as good!

That concludes awards night, it was a very nice evening. I felt satisfied when I went home and I hope others did as well. Not everybody gets awards, so no worries everybody! This year was the first year for me to get an award since freshman year, and my freshman year practically everybody got an award. They're harder to get now, much fewer of them. So be happy for others, there is always next year, and remember that Marching Band is supposed to be fun, not a competition.


(just a reminder, if you can remember who else got awards, please comment)

Ruben's Tube

This is amazing! I love it! Of course, found it on MIT's website.

You know you're a geek if. . .

The link on the right margin of my blog links to a Geek Test. Allow me to share which of the criteria I meet in the "Geek Test". At the end, I will add a few of my own questions for the geek test.

I HAVE...

• programmed a calculator in math class
• dated a geek
• done homework that wasn't required
• looked forward to dissecting a frog, pig, etc.
• worn 2+ watches at the same time
• a perfect attendance record in high school
• taken notes in more than one color
• thought I could win a quiz show
• corrected a salesperson on technical specs
• corrected a supervisor on spelling or grammar
• written a letter to the editor
• indexed and catalogued any personal collection
• solved a Rubik's cube
• solved an entire 500+ piece puzzle

I HAVE BEEN. . .

• in a fan club or on their mailing list
• called a geek
• several times
• in "smart" classes
• in marching band
• to band camp
• in the chess club
• on any sort of academic team
• in a math competition
• placed high or won

I HAVE . . . (2)

• attended a geek party
• been really excited about attending a geek party
• thrown a geek party
• taken the Mensa test
• quoted Yoda in conversation or debate, at least semi-seriously
• never turned down a date

I HAVE READ . . .

• Douglas Adams
• Piers Anthony
• Isaac Asimov
• books on math/science outside class
• entire calculator manuals
• software/computer language books
• joke/humor books for self-enrichment

I WANT. . .

• more computers
• a yurt
• ASIMO
• more RAM
• GPS
• to score well on this test

I HAVE SEEN (2+ TIMES). . .

• The Fellowship of the Ring
• The Two Towers
• The Matrix
• Any Monty Python movie
• Princess Bride
• TRON
• War Games

I OWN. . .

• Rubik's cube
• 2+ Rubik's cubes
• 1 or 2 computers
• 2+ DVD players
• a techie black outfit
• several maps and/or globes
• 2+ dictionaries
• 2+ calculators
• > 1 trivia game
• > 1 video game console
• binoculars
• laser pointer

I LIKE TO. . .

• play with numbers
• play with words/sounds
• play with hazardous chemicals
• go to the library
• browse the Geek webring
• do logic games
• put together puzzles
• turn on my computer first thing in the morning
• program
• buy used video games
• work mathematical problems
• tinker with electronics
• make people think I'm weird
• play with Lego
• listen to NPR or AM radio
• learn on my own

I PLAY. . .

• chess
• word games (like boggle, scrabble, crosswords)
• trivia games
• games that have received a Mensa award
• solitaire games
• Weird Al Yankovic
• show tunes
• music that nobody else listens to, ever
• no sports
• more than one musical instrument
• Risk
• all the way to the end

I WEAR. . .

• computer-humor t-shirts
• shirts that proclaim geekhood

I HAVE. . . (3)

• had long Mac vs. PC debates
• created a website
• submitted my personal website to search engines
• more than 3 e-mail addresses
• more than 3 screen names
• dated someone over the internet

I KNOW. . .

• Java
• ASCII
• HTML and/or JavaScript
• l337 sp33k
• what http:// stands for
• what dpi stands for
• what E=mc^2 means
• the three laws of robotics
• and who invented them
• the value of pi (to 10 digits)
• that Aol is the Spawn of Satan
• that Bill Gates is both God and Satan
• how to use special functions on a scientific calculator
• chemical symbols for 10+ elements
• the difference between speed and velocity
• the names of 3 temperature scales
• and the H2O freezing/boiling points of each
• the difference between nuclear fission and fusion
• how to count in hexadecimal
• what a "patch" means in computer terms
• what the blue screen of death means

I KNOW. . . (2)

• how to count to 31 on one hand
• how to play 7+ games with regular deck(s) of cards
• how to roll-step and high-step in time
• my age in binary
• my Geek Code
• extensive, useless trivia
• how to write 1999 in Roman numerals
• that the answer is 42.
• that I am a geek

Those are all the ones on the test that I can answer yes to. It's sad, I know, but every single one is true, all of them. Here are some things I think should be added to the test.

• You know how to spell the "Rubik's" of the "Rubik's Cube"
• You find funny.
• You think the following picture is ROTFLMAO worthy:

• You know what ROTFLMAO means.

Math Jokes

[UPDATE] Why do 2 of the comments left on this post not make any sense?!?!? Come on people, I do read these things! WTF is that third comment about anyway? Molly's comment and the anonymous comment make no sense!!!

Hilarious! Oh the things that you can find on MIT's website.

Math Jokes. That's all.

13 Days!!!

Hi. Haven't actually watched this with sound, but it's gr8 without sound. I love it. 13 DAYS!

WII!!!!

Wii!

I'm Cartman, in a nutshell. I can relate to everything he's going through.

Me and Greg

So, December 2nd is coming up, and Greg and I are going to be rockin' it. Snoball, rockin' Snoball. We'll be showing our dates a good time in our schnazzy outfits and wooing them with our charming demeanor. Oh yes, it is going to be a good night. Ready for it Greg? Don't worry, I'll be sure to bail you out of any jams you get into, jk.

Sorry, rambling, but yes, Snoball night is going to be gr8. w00t, you ready?

Army Recruiters

I am in a bad mood. I'm sorry blog readers, you don't have to read this if you don't want, this is simply a vent.

Today in Microelectronics we had a "guest speaker" that was going to talk to us about "cool electronics opportunities in the military". It turned into an hour long intelligence deficient, grammatical, 4-wheel drive nightmare. The guest speaker was a Sgt. Wardle, the local recruiter for the army. Here's the problem I have with this. I don't want to be in the army, I want to learn microelectronics. Why was a forced to listen to an hour long commercial for a government program that I don't want to participate in, instead of learning a skill that a) I signed up for, and b) will actually benefit me in the future. I don't care about this stupid guy's new car that he bought with his limited military income, I don't care about his drag racing exploits, I don't want to visit his mySpace, and why in god's name did he say "You know, as long as you're careful, you can drink before you're 21 and the army won't care"? Why was I subjected to this?

There is a little test called the ASVAB. Basic, easy questions, I aced it, got a 96 out of 99. You need a 36 to get into the military. Our recruiter got a 27 the first time he took it. When he was in his 20's. Why am I forced to listen to his ramblings. Oh, just remembered something exciting that made me want to lunge at his face and rip it off! Guess where he went to college? ITT Tech!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRSAGIEORIULGEG! He even freaking dropped freaking out freaking! How dumb do you have to be to drop out of ITT Tech? Oh, he did eventually pass the ASVAB, he got a 37 his second time taking it. Would you like to see some types of questions on this test? These are straight off the ASVAB website.

So, basically, this put me in a bad mood for the rest of the day. I'm sorry, I don't like listening to commercials given by stupid car buffs with a 60 IQ. He did make sure to give away free lanyards and pens though, which I did steal from people that really wanted them so as to save them from a horrible fate.

Army recruiters suck, my two cents.

Enjoy this little Treasure

Click the picture to make it bigger, just like any other picture in my entire blog. Sheesh Molly and Christy! Get with the program! jk